THE RETURN OF RYAN BASS - Chapter 15
CHAPTER 15
"Surprise ryan! Bet you thought you'd seen the last of me!" JOANNE the crazed blue cucumber--now only a cucumber slice laying upon queen latifah's face--said as she smiled sinisterly. Ryan weatherbee gasped in horror as JOANNE the crazed blue cucumber slice ordered queen latifah to walk into the cathedral. Queen latifah did as JOANNE the crazed blue cucumber slice ordered as she ate a whole can of pringles.
"You! how can it be?! i thought my stylish mother jen PUMA karate chopped you into a salad bowl!" ryan weatherbee said to JOANNE the crazed blue cucumber slice.
"ah yes, she did. but with me in slices...it was the perfect opportunity to form an army and once & for all take you down." JOANNE the crazed blue cucumber slice said. Then all of a sudden an army of blue cucumber slices barged into the cathedral behind JOANNE the crazed blue cucumber slice and queen latifah, who was now eating her second can of pringles.
"i dont think so JOANNE." ryan weatherbee said then he went over to the cathedral altar & scraped up his burnt skin & placed it back on his body. "see, im here to reclaim everything that ive lost. & YOU are certainly not going to get in the way." ryan weatherbee said. Then ryan weatherbee pulled out an envelope filled with business cards of local businesses & then slid each business card through his buttcheeks & then threw them at JOANNE the crazed blue cucumber slice & her cucumber slice army. The impact of the butt-contaminated business cards stunned the cucumber slices & then ryan weatherbee ran up to queen latifah.
"this is for giving me a terminal illness!" ryan weatherbee shouted then he flicked her earlobe & queen latifah immediately passed out & choked on an entire can of pringles. Ryan weatherbee then stuffed JOANNE the crazed blue cucumber slice & her army of cucumber slices into queen latifah's pringles can and then ran outside & threw the can at an elderly helsinkian nun & then he fell down a manhole & landed in the colloseum in rome right in the middle of lizzie mcguire's performance of "this is what dreams are made of" & he started singing a duet with her and then paulo came on stage so ryan weatherbee climbed into his pants & shouted "ravioli ravioli give me the formuoli" and then he climbed out of paulos pants & threw him into the trevi fountain then lizzie mcguire invited him backstage & they ate dried apricots together.
"lizzie mcguire can you use your newfound stardom to find my friend quin roseboom hes a giant tennis ball & he was kidnapped by a tree branch named ryan treeves whos impersonating me" ryan weatherbee said to lizzie micguire then she choked on a dried apricot & fell into a bathtub & then animated lizzie mcguire came up to ryan weatherbee.
"im pretty sure theyre with taylor swift" animated lizzie mcguire said.
"ok thanks" ryan weatherbee said then charlie puth came up to them & said "die" & every person in rome burst through the backstage door & ended charlie puth's career so then ryan weatherbee scooped actual lizzie mcguire out of the bathtub & placed her in paulo's pants & then he jumped down the bathtub drain & landed on taylor swift's cat & then he looked around taylor swift's house & couldnt believe what he saw.
Find out what ryan weatherbee saw in the next chapter of THE RETURN OF RYAN BASS!!!
"Surprise ryan! Bet you thought you'd seen the last of me!" JOANNE the crazed blue cucumber--now only a cucumber slice laying upon queen latifah's face--said as she smiled sinisterly. Ryan weatherbee gasped in horror as JOANNE the crazed blue cucumber slice ordered queen latifah to walk into the cathedral. Queen latifah did as JOANNE the crazed blue cucumber slice ordered as she ate a whole can of pringles.
"You! how can it be?! i thought my stylish mother jen PUMA karate chopped you into a salad bowl!" ryan weatherbee said to JOANNE the crazed blue cucumber slice.
"ah yes, she did. but with me in slices...it was the perfect opportunity to form an army and once & for all take you down." JOANNE the crazed blue cucumber slice said. Then all of a sudden an army of blue cucumber slices barged into the cathedral behind JOANNE the crazed blue cucumber slice and queen latifah, who was now eating her second can of pringles.
"i dont think so JOANNE." ryan weatherbee said then he went over to the cathedral altar & scraped up his burnt skin & placed it back on his body. "see, im here to reclaim everything that ive lost. & YOU are certainly not going to get in the way." ryan weatherbee said. Then ryan weatherbee pulled out an envelope filled with business cards of local businesses & then slid each business card through his buttcheeks & then threw them at JOANNE the crazed blue cucumber slice & her cucumber slice army. The impact of the butt-contaminated business cards stunned the cucumber slices & then ryan weatherbee ran up to queen latifah.
"this is for giving me a terminal illness!" ryan weatherbee shouted then he flicked her earlobe & queen latifah immediately passed out & choked on an entire can of pringles. Ryan weatherbee then stuffed JOANNE the crazed blue cucumber slice & her army of cucumber slices into queen latifah's pringles can and then ran outside & threw the can at an elderly helsinkian nun & then he fell down a manhole & landed in the colloseum in rome right in the middle of lizzie mcguire's performance of "this is what dreams are made of" & he started singing a duet with her and then paulo came on stage so ryan weatherbee climbed into his pants & shouted "ravioli ravioli give me the formuoli" and then he climbed out of paulos pants & threw him into the trevi fountain then lizzie mcguire invited him backstage & they ate dried apricots together.
"lizzie mcguire can you use your newfound stardom to find my friend quin roseboom hes a giant tennis ball & he was kidnapped by a tree branch named ryan treeves whos impersonating me" ryan weatherbee said to lizzie micguire then she choked on a dried apricot & fell into a bathtub & then animated lizzie mcguire came up to ryan weatherbee.
"im pretty sure theyre with taylor swift" animated lizzie mcguire said.
"ok thanks" ryan weatherbee said then charlie puth came up to them & said "die" & every person in rome burst through the backstage door & ended charlie puth's career so then ryan weatherbee scooped actual lizzie mcguire out of the bathtub & placed her in paulo's pants & then he jumped down the bathtub drain & landed on taylor swift's cat & then he looked around taylor swift's house & couldnt believe what he saw.
Find out what ryan weatherbee saw in the next chapter of THE RETURN OF RYAN BASS!!!